The Girls I've Been By: Tess Sharpe
Blog Post Surrounding Gender Identity
"Rebecca taught me how to lie. Samantha taught be how to hide. Haley taught me how to fight. Katie taught me fear. Ashley taught me survival. Nora put their lessons into practice" (356).
Our main character Nora had to slip into the identities of many different girls because she was taught that in order to survive she had to play the right part. Her mother started the con with her older sister Lee, and when Nora came into the picture after Lee left, and she became her mother's prodigy. Now Nora is trapped inside a bank with her best friend/ ex- boyfriend, current girlfriend, and all the secrets she's been running from.
Rebecca: Rebecca was "sweet, silent, and smiling"(36), always collecting information and watching those around her. She was the innocent and sweet daughter, but also knew how to tell the perfect lie. Staying in that idea of what a young woman "should be", "seen but not heard". Rebecca filled the role perfectly as her mother played the single widow with a young adorable little girl. Rebecca played into the role that society puts young women in, and her mother created the perfect puppet to take part in her schemes.
Samantha: Samantha was "danity, delicate, and demure"(70), Samantha had the job of playing the daughter a suburban would dream of having, tight french braids, and poofy dresses all while having tea parties. Samantha was the ideal young women in their situation never drawing too much attention, "the quieter I am, the more they will forget I'm around. And people- men especially, I will find- say and do the most secret things out loud when they don't think you're important. When you're sweet and you fetch beers and slice limes and are never a bother. I wasn't real to any of them, and when you're not rea, the things you learn are endless" (71). Others, men specifically paid Samantha no mind, and the women would dote on her as she resembled the daughter of their dreams.
Haley: Was the part where gender roles took a little flip. Haley was supposed to be humble, faithful, and modest"(99), in order to help her mother secure the Pastor. This is when Haley meets Jamison and is awoken to the role her mother wants her to play, "pay attention when you meet him. If he smiles at you, you'll know to plat it up until he has a crush on you. If he doesn't, or if he starts acting like a little shit, then you can lean into that, too."My eyebrows knit together. "What do you mean?" "Everyone needs someone to bully, baby"(100). Haley became Jamison's biggest target giving him all the ammunition when he found out about this fathers engagement to her mother. Haley knew the role her mother wanted her to play so she let what happened to her go with her mothers mantra "that's the way the world is, baby" ringing in her ears. Haley took all the punches, and built up all the scars she could bare just for comfortability, and even at age ten she knew this was not the way she wanted her life to be, how she wanted to be treated by others.
Katie: She was "sweet, spirited, and smart"(163), but Katie was a fighter, and she was the "first spitfire Mom lets me be, the closest thing to me I've been in years" (174). Katie learned she will choose to fight instead of flight in the response to danger. Which isn't usually how we see stories of predators go, but she fought and wouldn't submit to being"soft", but in that instance she learned what it meant to be scared. She also learned what she was capable of in a life threatening situation. Instead of the common story of a prince charming coming to save the day Katie pulled herself out of the trenches, no help from mom, or Joesph obviously, but just her being her own hero. Being a survivor.
Ashley: Ashley had little to no fear, she was no longer there to be a pawn but to create a change for all the treatment she had received. Ashley learned about knife's, how to shoot, and she mastered how to manipulate. When she walked into the room with Raymond standing over her mother with a gun aimed at her head, she didn't run, or hide as the first girls before her would. Ashley is how I want more female characters to be shown, in a position where it might seem that they are what is expected from us by society: weak, fragile, but Ashley squashed all of those generalizations, and misogynistic views with the shot of her gun.
Nora: Nora is dating Iris, and tends to display more masculine traits as she now presents herself without the grooming of her mother. Nora is all the young girls combined into a person who she has yet to fully understand. She helps to show just how complex and complicated being a woman in society is, and yes she had a hard time growing up within the world her mother created for her, but she showed the strength to move past that. Nora challenges the social construct of what is expected of young women being her own knight in shining armor, and using her skills and knowledge to progress how young women in socirty should be seen.
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